Resolution #110: Electrocute Myself Until I Get A Sexy Set Of Six Pack Abs!!!

Date: 4-20-2014

Due Date: 4-20-2015

Resolution: Believe it or not, I was very close to having a six-pack at one point in my life, and no this isn't a stupid beer joke. If it was then I’d finish it with, “but then I normally end up drinking more.” Anyway, between the ages of 17 and 19, I got really into weight lifting. Hopefully, this site shows that when I really get into something I really commit.

I did a lot of heavy lifting so I got big. At my peak, I could lift my shirt and push my gut out and you could see the evidence of my efforts. I never quite got to the point where you could see any definition in a relaxed state and probably never will. I'm fine with that though.

During this brief time of my life, I would buy bodybuilding magazines to learn new techniques and whatnot. There were always ads in the back of these magazines for some form of electric stimulation workout machines. This was before any of the cheap infomercial versions came out.

I was always fascinated by the concept, but these things were expensive, especially for a high school kid. The fact that Drago from Rocky used this technology as did Bruce Lee, at least that's what the movie Dragon taught me, added some validity to the claims these machines were making.

I in no way think this think will shock me into shape. I've just always been interested and figured I'd use the April Fools line of resolutions to give it a shot. 

 

Result #110: I Would Have Never Thought That NOT Repeatedly Shocking Myself Would Ever Lead To A Failure…

 

Update #1: The Conclusion…

Date: 4-20-2015

Even though I failed and I have my doubts that it works like magic, I'm still intrigued by Electric Muscle Stimulation. I failed this experiment for two reasons. One as with most of these April Fool's themed challenges it didn't rank high enough on my priorities for the financial focus to buy the Butter Abs.

This resolution may have ended up being a higher priority if it wasn't for reason number two; I didn't end up losing the weight I wanted to get rid of before starting this experiment. Granted this is based on my own logic with no scientific backing but in my head, Electric Muscle Stimulation feels like it would work better at toning muscle that is already there and not to create muscle from a fat gut.

Again, this is just a theory in my head that is very likely to be flawed. This is why I'm a fan of unscientific self-tests and this is why I kept this particular self-test on hold.

 
 

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