SNL: SEASON SIXTEEN SUMMARYRead More
WELCOME TO MY SATURDAY NIGHT LIFE
Formerly Known As Seeso Many Saturday Nights!!!
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with Dennis Miller talking to Lorne Michaels about this being his Last Show which leads Lorne to joke that this better not be a repeat of the Jon Lovitz situation where he's been on almost every other episode since he left. During their conversation, Dennis admits that he would love to make the opening announcement before he goes to which Lorne points him to the camera and says go ahead. Dennis then announced, "Live from New York..." only it didn't lead to the open credits until Lorne stepped in and officially announced, "Live from New York..." which got the show to begin.
- George Wendt then officially opened the show with a monolog about how excited he is to have the Queen Of England in the audience. He then points her out to welcome her to the show. He's so excited to meet her that he grabs her and starts to make out. She looks a little rattle as she falls to her seat and George gets back to his monolog. George then went on to start to explain an upcoming sketch that he's proud of but then realizes that it's too hard to explain so he grabbed the Queen to us as a prop to highlight why the physicality of the sketch was making him laugh just thinking about it. This led the Queen to plot her escape but was caught while George was in the middle of telling a tale of his high school wrestling days which led him to grab the royal leader and swing her all over the room.
- We then got a fake ad for Lil' General Fireworks which is a line of fireworks that are specifically targeted to kids while claiming at the same time that they are stronger than any other brand.
- Mr. No-Depth Perception then made his show debut where Kevin Nealon plays the husband with no-depth perception who struggles to function since his sight is so far off. Whether he yelled when people are close or missed the glasses while pouring the wine, his disorder led to Nealon's failure with even the simplest of tasks.
- Bill Swerski's Super Fans then returned for another installment this time with George Wendt at the wheel as he and his drinking buddies discuss their love of "DA BEARS!!!" This week the group of hypothetical bets by putting the Bears as a team against people in other sport, including a bus full of Bears with Ditka at the wheel taking on all of NASCAR.
- Middle-Aged Man also made a return to help Victoria Jackson with her garbage disposal while giving her old man advice, only to be thwarted by his nemesis Independent Widow which led him to need the help of his trusty sidekick Drinking Buddy. These two middle-aged pals don't have what it take to defeat Independent Widow so they seek advice from Retired Man who lives on a mountain like he's Zeus. It turns out the secret to defeating Independent Woman is releasing a roach in the room which led her to demand that the men take control and kill the filthy pest.
- Elvis Costello then took to the stage to perform The Other Side of Summer.
- Dennis Miller then gave us his final installment of the news. This week, Chris Farley dropped in as Stormin' Norman Schwarzkopf to defend some of the homophobic works that he was caught using during the war. At first, this starts as an apology but then turns into a parody of wrestling hype as Schwarzkopf announces that he wants to fight Evander Holyfield. Chris Rock also stopped by to discuss why Collin Powell would never be selected as George Bush Sr.'s pick for Vice President during his second run because that would most likely lead to a black person killing Bush to bring in the first black President while the assassin would be treated like a hero in jail.
- Carsenio then made his show debut in this sketch that parodies both Johnny Carson and Arsenio Hall by merging the two together. Of course, most of the humor came from the fact that it's mainly about Johnny on the verge of retirement trying to act young and black. Other than that, there was an interview with George Wendt as himself who worries that Johnny is going insane in his effort to cope with retirement which Johnny takes rather well.
- Burger Barn was a sketch that took place in a fast food drive-thru where George Wendt played a dad who wants to keep things simple by ordering everyone in the care the same exact thing but as the ordering started, each family member wants their order to be customized. This impromptu order changing led to frustrated George and a confused Burger Barn employee. George eventually snapped and went back to his original plan of ordering five burgers and five drinks not caring at all about individual choice.
- The Shindells is the classic Shoowap Shoowah sketch where George Wendt played the lead of a five-man Doo-Wop group who broke into conversation during their song only to chime in with their Shoowap Shoowah line in time with the song they are trying to perform.
- It's Pat also returned and this week Pat dropped into a mixed gender barber shop with George Wendt in control of the shears who struggles to determine Pat's gender in order to figure out how to style his/her hair.
- This was followed by an installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack shared his family memories that aren't really as clear as he claims.
- I'm Chillin' was yet another reoccurring sketch to return where Chris Rock and Chris Farley host their cable access show to talk about their malt liquor sponsor before sharing The Mother Joke Of The Day.
- Elvis Costello then returned to the stage to perform So Like Candy.
- The Sunrise Show was a parody of a morning show where Jan Hooks interviews George Wendt, who played a Raffi-like child singer who was trying to transition to promoting his adult music career which is extremely off from what the host was expecting as it's gruff bluesy only to switch back to sounding childish the moment he starts singing about sex. I was expecting this to shock the host but instead, she just sang along.
- Finally, George Wendt closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with another Message From The President Of The United States where Dana Carvey as Bush Sr. discusses a recent health scare that stemmed from an irregular issue with his heart. To show that he now has things under control he shows off host new heart monitor and how good he is a regulating his beats by getting his heart to beat faster when thinking of his wife then have it drop back down to normal with the use of some calming word. After showing off his new medical device he goes on to call out president from the past who wore unhealthier than him, leading up to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Delta Burke then officially opened the show with a monolog about how nervous she discovered she was to host a live comedy show explaining how she should be used to it considering she's on a high rated comedy show and has experience with audiences thanks to her pageant days. It's at this point where the monolog evolved to become a sketch where they profiled Delta's week in the style of introducing a freshly crowned Miss America.
- This was followed by a fake ad for a product called Balz-Off that virtually castrates busy women's husbands so they will be more calm, attentive, and helpful at home.
- Wayne's World then returned for another installment where the two basement dwelling cable access hosts celebrate "Chick and Babes" by sharing a top ten list of the best-looking women in Hollywood to celebrate the start of Spring. The number one spot goes to Madonna which then took us to a flashback/dream sequence where Wayne and Garth play truth or dare with the real Madonna and Wayne dares her to make out. During this make out session the scene evolves into a bit of a parody of the rated R video that Madonna had recently released.
- NRA Theatre was a fake show hosted by Charlton Heston who bitches about the potential implementation of The Brady Bill before sharing a scene that shows what America would look like if this bill were to actually go through. In this scary world, a simple background check is the only thing that stands between an innocent and their gun. Yes, these citizens do get a medieval mace to hold them over while they wait but this isn't enough to stop the bad guys from winning in the end.
- This was followed by an installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack tells the tale of a strange cowboy who fell a little too in love with his land.
- Chris Isaak then took to the stage to perform Wicked Game.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Adam Sandler dropped in for a segment about Mother's Day where he acted out his side of their usual conversation so that she can watch record the show to watch on her special day while Adam is out of town.
- We then went to a Weight Watchers Meeting where Stuart Smalley is the only guy in the room full of overweight girls who all get yelled encouragements from the host who speaks in bumper-stickers. The moment she finishes her opening spiel Chris Farley enters the room with a bag full of food and no intentions to lose any weight since his job is forcing him to be there. If Farley's unwillingness to play along wasn't enough Stuart Smalley keeps trying to hijack the process with his 12 Step approach to self-help. To add to the insanity, Delta Burke played a character who is so into the Weight Watchers' point system that it's all she can talk about while Victoria Jackson is so fragile that she can't talk about anything without being brought to the verge of tears.
- Hollywood Minute was a parody of an Entertainment Tonight-style segment where Victoria Jackson first share the news of a scene cut from Spartacus because of the gay acts it portrayed, then went on with news about the anniversary of Ocean's Eleven. These two stories merge and Victoria went on to share a clip of a cut scene from Ocean's Eleven where Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. get a little comfortable while hanging out together in a hot tub.
- Karaoke Hog was a sketch that as the title implies, portrayed a karaoke host at a bar who is way too stingy when it comes to sharing the microphone which eventually led the regulars to plot a major revolt.
- Chris Isaak then returned to the stage to perform Diddley Daddy.
- Coffee Talk then returned with its original host, Paul Baldwin. Once again, this sketch mainly makes fun of the New York accent in a pretty funny way only this time he has Delta Burke as his in-studio guest who helps Paul to answer his calls. This installment has my favorite call from what sounded like Fred Wolf who asks, "In the state of New York, is it legal for a dog to drink coffee," to which he gets an emphatic, "No."
- Yelling At the Kids was a sketch where Delta Burke and Jan Hooks enjoyed coffee, smokes and their conversation while the children are having a playdate. The two women seem to have something to scream at their children following every single sentence of their conversation about more mature concerns.
- Finally, Delta Burke closed the show by thanking the audience and saying her goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
This week's show started with another installment of Pumping Up With Hans where Franz the muscle-bound brothers are back in their gym to squelch any rumors that they are on steroids before promoted an upcoming Arnold Schwarzenegger film which led them to make fun of Steven Seagal for being such a girlie man. Little did they know but he was behind them all of the time who then used mind over matter and his pinkie to put the pumped up cable hosts in their place leading to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
Steven Seagal then officially opened the show with a monolog where he lists off all of his films before going on to promote the new one and then rambling on about Zen in a build up to his performance of the song Kung Fu Fighting in what I have to admit was a pretty interesting arrangement.
Nico Tenelli was a parody of a cop movie where Steven Seagal played the traditional wildcard cops who gets demoted to working behind a desk after going a bit overboard during a drug bust. Nico (Seagal) then had to make copies as part of his new desk gig which is where we found out that this was actually another installment of the Richmeister sketch where Rob Schneider got beat up by the host.
All-Star Celebrity Tributes was a parody of a TV special to pay tribute to Tim Meadows for his services during the Persian Gulf War, and as with most of these TV special parodies, this is mainly a sketch that allows the cast to try out their most random celebrity impersonations.
The Dark Side With Nat X then returned for another segment of the only fifteen-minute show on television where Nat X gave the Top Five Reasons The L.A. Cops Beat Up Rodney King before interviewing Steven Seagal who does a pretty good Andrew Dice Clay impersonation.
Michael Bolton then took to the stage to perform Love Is A Wonderful Thing.
Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Mr. Subliminal dropped in for an editorial on a tell-all book about Nancy Reagan. Adam Sandler then made his news debut as a travel advisor where he shared a recent trip to Greece where he mainly talked about the hotel room that he stayed in, while barely mentioning the country at all. (Clip 2)
Musicians For Free-Range Chickens was a parody of a Farm Aid-type collaboration where it seemed the entire cast and crew impersonated a singer from the time to sing about the benefits of free-range chickens.
We then got another Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey segment where Jack shares the fact that he's humored by seeing some mystery thing that scurried across the room and latches on to people's necks.
Michael Bolton then took to the stage to perform Time, Love And Tenderness.
Brace Steele: Greenpeace Photographer was a parody of a Steven Seagal film where Seagal played the titular character who’s a badass with a camera out to fight corporate pollution by documenting their evil deed through his pictures. The only problem is, he doesn't seem to realize that photos don't capture the words being said which leads him to revert to using good old fashion violence.
Finally, Steven Seagal closed the show by thanking the audience and saying their goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with Frank And Nancy was a parody of Sid And Nancy only with Frank Sinatra and Nancy Reagan playing the titular roles. Though it's not a direct parody, it plays off the Sid and Nancy style relationship with Frank and Nancy having sex in the presidential suite or the White House while Ronald Reagan in on the TV screen giving a speech downstairs. The couple's sex grows to be so wild that they knock the ceiling plaster on to the president's head which led to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Catherine O'Hara then officially opened the show with a monolog about being excited to be back acting live because it reminds her of her early days in improv. She then claims to into an improvised seen only she has it extremely planned out. Even when taking requests from the audience she simply changes the suggestion to fit her needs in her efforts to get a laugh.
- We then got a repeat of the fake ad for The Dancer fitness device that provides guidance and resistance to optimize your workout/dance.
- This was followed by another installment of Sprockets where Dieter, our German host, interviews Catherine O'Hara who played a crazy German actress who played the star of my parody promo clip called The Head In A Rusty Metal Box. We then got to see several other clips from her other films that are equally surreal and crazy. This is another one of those sketches that I still quote to this day.
- MTV Spring Break 1991 was a sketch that parodied MTV during Spring Break which in the world of the sketch takes place at the Kennedy Compound, satirizing a rape scandal that took place at the site just earlier that year. If I wasn't already aware of this scandal, this felt like it was innocently making fun of the Kennedys for being womanizing drunks because they never mention the serious incident. This made the sketch a little disturbing because minus the incident being referenced it feels like they're glorifying these horrible beings.
- It's Pat then returned for another installment. This week Catherine O'Hara played the cashier and a drug store who struggles to solve the mystery of Pat's androgyny has she helps Pat with his/her personal hygiene products.
- We then got another edition of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where this time, Jack gives advice as to what to do if you were ever to fall off Sear's Tower.
- R.E.M. then took to the stage to perform Losing My Religion.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, David Spade dropped in for another segment of In And Out where he shares what's in and what's out in Hollywood.
- We then went to a meeting of The Justice League Of America where a collection of superheroes judge other superheroes as if it were The People's Court. The main case in this sketch is against Catherine O'Hara for flying in the standing position simply because the members of the League think that it looks too strange.
- Frank Gannon, P.I. P.I. is a sketch about a Politically Incorrect Private Investigator who makes horribly offensive assumptions based on stereotypes while trying to collect clues for the murder he's trying to solve.
- In Conclusion Theatre was a sketch about a show that only shares the final scenes from the movies being featured that week. This week's scene made absolutely zero sense minus the backstory behind how things turned out to be so strange.
- R.E.M. and Kate Pierson then teamed up and took to the stage to perform Shiny Happy People.
- Daily Affirmation also returned for another installment where Stuart Smalley works through more of his insecurities by reassuring himself that he's okay. His main focus this week is showing solidarity with the Kurds following the recent war in Iraq, ending on another Daily Affirmation.
- Wedding Dress To Funeral was a sketch were as the title suggests Catherine O'Hara shows up to a funeral in a wedding dress after mixing up the reason for the event while blocking out that her late fiance is in the casket.
- Finally, Catherine O'Hara closed the show by thanking the audience and saying her goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with a new installment of Pumping Up With Hans And Franz where the two muscle-bound brothers are in Kuwait on a camel in order to start their own Persian Gulf War not realizing that the actual war is already over. After a while, they have a run-in with a local who clears it all up which led to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Jeremy Irons then officially opened the show with a monolog about his busy week and how the Monday following the show he'll be at the Academy Awards Ceremony for being nominated as best actor while humbly claiming that it's no big deal only to spend the rest of the monolog making jokes that clearly show there's nothing humble about his interests at all.
- We then got a repeat of the fake ad for the McIntosh Jr. that I could only find the audio to just earlier in the year. The ad shares a kid showing off the homework assignment that he created with his McIntosh Jr. computer, highlighting the technology of the time. The ad ends when one of the kid's friends points out a type to which the kid replies that the mistake was intentional and his use of "Pubic" Library is part of an inside joke.
- The Richmeister then returned for another installment of Rob Schneider as the Richmeister who entertains himself at work by jokingly calling his coworkers by various forms of their names while pointing out the fact that they are, "Making copies..." This week's edition took place during an after-hours company party where the Richmeister does his usual routine only his coworkers drop by his desk to get drinks from the makeshift bar that's been set up right next to the copier.
- Sherlock Holmes Surprise Party was a sketch where Sherlock's friends try to throw a surprise party but it doesn't take long for the great detective to figure everything out piecing together where ever hidden guest is based on a handful of subtle clues. His inability to be surprised ruined the festive energy in the room.
- We then got another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack muses about what would make for a good clown story.
- Lonesome Cowboys was a sketch where three cowboys out on the range discuss their plans for when they get into town which leads Jeremy Irons into a song about the lonesome cowboy life
- Fishbone then took to the stage to perform Sunless Saturday.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, the real Razor Ruddock dropped by to explain the controversy during his Mike Tyson fight where he felt the referee called it too early only before he can get out more than a couple words Dennis Miller cuts him off. Chris Rock also got a segment to talk about the controversy around New Jack City and how to stay safe while watching this movie with a crowd.
- We then went to a bar where the women from the show are obsessed with Jeremy Irons' English Accent to the point where they seem more interested in the way that he says words over being interested in the man himself as they give him a laundry list of things to say.
- Wayne's World then returned for another installment where the two basement dwelling cable access hosts shared their Oscar picks for the Academy Awards that were to be handed out in a couple of days. They also included Oscar picks that they made earlier in the day at a different location to celebrate the technical side of the industry.
- Hannibal Lecter Meets Mace was a parody of Silence Of The Lambs where Hannibal Lecter is introduced to a new cellmate named Mace who's a complete nut job who talks to his hand over shared glasses of toilet wine. At first, this was more about Mace's craziness until about halfway through when we delved into Hannibal's well thought out sadistic state of mind.
- This was followed by another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack explains his little trick that he uses whenever he feels the urge to kill someone.
- We then got a fake ad for the Buzz Pen which is simply a set of clippers the size of a pen that allows you to shave important messages into the side of your friends' heads. This ad also featured a cameo from Razor Ruddick where he managed to get out a couple more lines than he got to during the news.
- Fishbone then returned to the stage to perform Everyday Sunshine.
- We then got a fake ad for an album called Looney Tunes Classics which is a collection of genuine classical music that is now better known for its placement in silly cartoons.
- Football Days was a Jock Handey short film that's pretty much a drawn-out version of Deep Thought only acted out where Jack shares a tale of his days playing football as a teen.
- Finally, Jeremy Irons closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with The President's Second Post Gulf War Speech where Dana Carvey as Bush Sr. addresses the nation a second time following the "successful" defeat of Iraq. This second round of updates is more of an ego boost to get cheers for the president in a time where he needed approval thanks to the recession that was also going on at the time. This sketch also made fun of Michael J. Fox as Dan Quayle who struggles with deciding whether or not to stand and clap following every sentence Bush Sr. completes. Of course, this being the opening sketch it eventually built to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Michael J. Fox then officially opened the show with a monolog about finally giving into the show's request to host the show and how he finally gave in to promote the movie The Hard Way which then led to a parody of Back To The Future where Doc and Dana Carvey who plays another Michael J. Fox rush in to warn the real Michael J. Fox about the results of the evening. The Doc and two Michaels then went back to the day where David Spade as Michael J. Fox met with Lorne to sign on as host in their effort to save all three Michael J.s from making a mistake by signing on the dotted line.
- We then got a repeat of the Chia Head ad from earlier in the year where balding men put chia seeds on their heads as a hair replacement product.
- Stinging Clown was a sketch that took place at a traveling fair where Michael J. Fox gets called into the manager's trailer to discuss the complaints of his clown act. It turns out there was a bit of a mix up because where the manager thought he hires a singing clown, he ended up with a stinging clown on his hands who took pleasure in stinging the kids with thorns from plants and needles on sticks which, of course, led to his firing.
- We then got another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack warns why one might not want to take their dog with them into outer space.
- Central High, Class Reunion was a sketch that took place at a ten-year reunion where Michael J. Fox has a run-in with an overly protective classmate who he barely remembers. This old friend now wants to use the shady connections that he's made as an adult to offer revenge on anyone who has wronged his former classmates.
- Black Crowes then took to the stage to perform Thick And Thin.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, A. Whitney Brown dropped in for another Big Picture segment where he discusses the trend of taking pride in America's actions even though most "We did it" people are often the last who would actually get involved.
- America's Most Wanted: Former Child Stars was, as the title suggests, a parody of America's Most Wanted where they profiled childhood celebrities who grew to have troubles with the law. We also got a reenactment where all of these grown failed stars have gotten together to form a bit of a crime syndicate.
- Daily Affirmation then returned for another installment. This week Stuart Smalley read a letter from the audience to start the show but this only sets Stuart up to announce that his show is being moved from the optimal slot at noon to the undesirable 2:30 in the AM time where he doubts that it will be seen. Before he can get too down on himself for the show's new time he switches gears by sharing his Daily Affirmation.
- Black Crowes then returned to the show to perform She Talks to Angels.
- Not Gettin' Any was a panel show hosted by Michael J. Fox who talks to a group of guys about why they think they haven't gotten any sex in such a long time and how it's been affecting their lives. It doesn't take much talking for it to become clear why none of these men are able to find a mate.
- This was followed by another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack muses on about what it might have been like when the Vikings reign came to an end.
- The Elevator Fans returned from the Sting episode only this time they corner Michael J. Fox and share that they're fans by constantly singing the high parts to either the Back To The Future theme song or the "Sha-la-la-la" line from the end of the song from Family Ties.
- We then got yet another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack shares his views on boxing.
- Finally, Michael J. Fox closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with another parody of The McLaughlin Group where once again, Dana Carvey portrayed the blowhard host who throws rapid-fire political questions to his panel of guest only to belittle them if they don't agree with his stance word for word by yelling at them how they are "WRONG" if their opinion is just a little off. Of course, this being the opening sketch is eventually builds to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Alec Baldwin then officially opened the show with a monolog about being excited to host for a second time pointing out that his last appearance was nominated for an Emmy which than took us into Alec's head to hear his inner thoughts as he starts to worry that he's not being a humble host. We then bounce around to hear the inner thoughts of everyone including the cast, crew, and even Whitney Houston as they all begin to wonder if it is their fault that Alec seems stuck in his head. Normally, I don't like the "brace yourself for a bad show" jokes, but in this case, it was done right with the proper amount of humor to where it didn't come across as a real concern.
- We then got a fake ad for a piece of workout equipment called The Dancer where users strap themselves into this machine that provides both resistance and guidance for you to dance through your daily work out.
- The Honest Planet was a sketch that as the title suggests takes place on a planet where there are no lies and we get to witness a business meeting where we hear first-hand everyone's dishonest motivations as they navigate their way through the backhanded business world.
- The Sinead O'Connor Awards was a parody award show where Sinead O'Connor reluctantly honor artists for their material success despite being soulless performers. Even though this isn't really a positive award, the winners are pleased as punch to even be nominated.
- Whitney Houston then took to the stage to perform "I'm Your Baby Tonight"
- Lank Thompson: I'm A Handsome Actor was an infomercial parody hosted by Mike Meyers who is pitching a process to take any hack and turn them into a handsome actor without much focus on acting skills. Alec Baldwin played the guest to provide evidence that the process actually works by sharing his horrible acting skills that don't matter because he looks good while going through the motions.
- This was followed by a fake ad for Pan Am making fun of how competitive the airline's deals were as we built up to the first Persian Gulf War since everyone was worried about hijackers. In order to offset peoples fear, this ad offers each passenger the ability to keep the plane if they opted to fly with Pan Am which I believe had a horrible reputation for safety at the time.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, "Bob Dylan" dropped in to finish off his speech that was cut off when he accepted a Grammy earlier in the year. He speaks in such Dylan-esque terms that Miller has to act as his interpreter until things got so bad that they had to bring in Tom Petty to help cipher some sense into Dylan's signature ramblings.
- We then got a Sci-Fi parody of The Godfather, Part IV where the new Godfather is more like the Emperor from the Star War series while mixing in a handful of Star Trek references as well, while throwing in clips from all three references to tell the follow-up of a tale.
- I'm Chillin' then returned for another installment where the urban version of Wayne's World played by Chris Rock and Chris Farley discuss the latest urban trends before giving The Mother Joke Of The Week. After this, Tim Meadows dropped in as Flavor Flav to give props to the soldiers fighting in the Middle East as they announce that they'll be sending the troops a case of F'ed Up Malt Liquor to thank them for their services.
- Whitney Houston then returned to the stage to perform All The Man I Need.
- Confession Can Be Exciting For The Soul was a sketch where, as the title implies, takes place in a confession booth on the day where the church decided to take down the screen of secrecy. Julia Sweeney is the first to try this new approach and is so distracted by Alec Baldwin as the good-looking priest that she can barely get through her confession. Though this sketch has a little bit of the hot host as a prop problem that I often complain about where the comedy comes from the reaction of the host's good looks, this time it worked because Baldwin's character wasn't taking this as an ego boost and he also had several funny lines.
- This was followed by SNL's take on Cyrano De Bergerac where Tim Meadows played a wide-nosed De Bergerac who provides the words for Alec Baldwin in his effort to win over Roxanne. Meadows being black not only led to the wide-nose reference but it also leads to a much more soulful tone to the words that he provides.
- This was followed by another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack asks an interesting question about names and dolphins only to share an unexpected answer in the end.
- Finally, Alec Baldwin closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnight.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with a Gulf War Briefing From Mr. Subliminal where Kevin Nealon gives the press an update on the build-up to the ground war sneaking in his real thoughts between delivering the "official narrative" and also shutting down any question using his subliminal powers to perform the Jedi Mind Trick. Once the press went silent Kevin turned to look straight at the camera to announce, "Live from New York..."
- Roseanne Barr then officially opened the show with a monolog about her successes and failures building up to the announcement that with tonight's appearance she is now Officially Overexposed!!! Which leads to more of a stand-up routine about this controversial phase of her career.
- We then got the classic fake ad for MetroCard that parodied ads from the time that bragged about how helpful their call center support team members are only in this case Roseanne plays an operator who's a real pain in the ass but the customer's account of this instance of excellence makes it sound like she was actually super helpful.
- This was followed by a parody of Misery II with Roseanne playing the Kathy Bates character and in this silly sequel, she captures Dana Carvey who, in the world of the sketch, just retired the Church Lady and Roseanne is holding him hostage in an effort to bring her back to life.
- The Sally Jessy Raphael also returned to the show, in this installment Jan Hooks as Sally host an episode with Tom and Roseanne Arnold as her guest to talk about an upcoming TV movie that exposes the behind the scenes chaos the crazy couple is creating. In the sketch, we jumped back and forth between the real Tom and Roseanne on Sally's stage and Victoria Jackson and Chris Farley playing them in the promotional clips of the upcoming show as we worked through what was fiction and what was real. It turns out, Tom and Roseanne are angry at the fictional tale about their lives because it made them look too tame even though they are portrayed as monsters.
- Deee-Lite with Bootsy Collins And The Rubber Band then took to the stage to perform World Clique.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, we got introduced to Iraqi Pete played by Adam Sandler and sold as a blatant stereotype built off of fear-based propaganda to yell at the audience like a pro-wrestler and dehumanize the enemy as we build up to war.
- It's Pat then returned for another installment where this time the androgynist character has a run in with Roseanne who is staying late at work to put in a little overtime. As always, this sketch is mainly about the guest trying to figure out which sex Pat is by asking a bunch of roundabout questions instead of blatantly asking what sex he or she is and of course, Pat's answers are as ambiguous as his/her appearance.
- McIntosh Jr. was a funny sketch but I could only find the sound file on the internet. What I heard was a bunch of kids talking about the assignment one kid created with his home computer. One kid noticed a typo, only the kid who created the piece of digital art admitted that he intentionally changed "Public" to "Pubic" in his image of the "Pubic Library."
- A Presidents' Day Remembrance was a sketch were Mike Myers shared a bit of history about President Lincoln's personal life through a collection of reenactments showing the manic relationship that he had with his wife. The fighting in the reenactment gets so extreme that it carries over into Mike Myers' separated set.
- This was followed by one of the most memorable fake ads from my early teen years as this was the ad that introduced us to Happy Fun Ball which is simply a bouncy ball with more warnings that you would find in the most ridiculous of prescription pill ads.
- Iraqi Pete then returned for a quick installment outside of the news where this Iraqi stereotype continues to taunt the crowd in a very pro-wrestling tone.
- Comedy Killers was the classic sketch inspired by Roseanne's controversial performance of The National Anthem, where contestants play a Jeopardy-like show and have to answer questions related to joke topics that are guaranteed not to win any laughs from a mainstream audience. It's because of this sketch that I'll never forget what's credited for starting WWI.
- Deee-Lite with Bootsy Collins And The Rubber Band then returned to the stage to perform The Power of Love.
- Victoria's Secrets then made its show debut where Victoria Jackson, dressed in lingerie, reveals a handful of her inner secrets in a way that leaves more mystery than the secret itself playing up her questionably dumb blonde character.
- Opposites Attract White Trash History Minute a reenactment sketch showing the night that Roseanne invented Tuna Noodle Casserole by randomly putting together white trash ingredients.
- Finally, Roseanne Barr closed the show by thanking the audience and saying her goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with a Desert Storm Press Briefing where Phil Hartman plays Dick Cheney who give a quick update before handing the press conference over to Kevin Nealon who is in charge of answering questions from the press. Despite warning in advance that he will not be sharing any information that would help the enemy but the press pool is only interested in very specific top secret details. Of course, this being the opening sketch it eventually builds to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Kevin Bacon then officially opened the show with a monolog about how he's nervous to host the show before going on to explain how his nerves express themselves which he follows up by displaying how he, as a professional actor, has trained himself to settle down, ending with an, "Oops I got too relaxed leading me to mess my pants," brand of joke.
- This was followed by a written explanation about how the fake ad for the No Execu-John was put on hold due to it being too silly in this time of turmoil due to the building Persian Gulf War. According to the note, this ad was supposed to be a briefcase for executives to poop in when they have nowhere else to go.
- The Richmeister then returned for another installment where the annoying Copy Guy pesters his coworkers while the try to work, mainly by continually calling out various renditions of their name while also pointing out that they are, in fact, "Making Copies." This week, the copier breaks down and Kevin Bacon plays the technician who informs the staff that the machine will have to be taken in for repair which is heartbreaking for The Richmeister because the copier is his connection to the world.
- The Dark Side With Nat X also returned for another installment of the only 15-minute show on TV because if it was any longer, "The Man would never give him a full hour." This week Nat X gives his "Top Five Reasons Brotha's Don't Play Hockey," before interviewing Tim Meadow who made his speaking debut to play The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Colin Powell and gets accused of being a sellout. This first interview doesn't last long because Nat X has no time for Powell's politics. Kevin Bacon then played Vanilla Ice who came out as the second guest only to be verbally attacked by our host leading up to a bit of a dance-off.
- The Sarcastic Clapping Family Of South Hampton was a sketch where a family of stuffy white people gets together to discuss their late father's will in an effort to avoid litigation. Family member after family member then gave over dramatic speeches only to earn a slow sarcastic clap from the family member next in line, who goes on to repeat the process.
- This was followed by another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack share a prank that he played on his nephew where he convinced the kid that Disneyland had burnt down.
- INXS then took to the stage to perform Bitter Tears.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, A. Whitney Brown dropped in for another Big Picture segment to discuss the horrible coverage of what he calls The Nintendo War when comparing it to The TV War that was Vietnam.
- Roommate Specifics was a sketch where Dana Carvey met up with Kevin Bacon to see if he wants to rent the extra space. The two then discuss their extremely quirky living habits to see if the two would get along, with each living habit getting stranger than the last.
- We then went to the Middle East to see a group of soldiers gets lectured about choices when writing their Messages On Bombs. The fact that they are writing messages isn't the issue as this meeting is more of an effort to push quality control when it comes to the content of their notes.
- SoundStage was an interview sketch that took place on a soundstage with Jon Hooks as a host who interviews a fictional folk duo played by Kevin Bacon and Kevin Nealon where Nealon does all of the guitar playing and singing while Bacon simply claps along. Things eventually go terribly wrong when Kevin Nealon performs a brand new song that has far too high of a tempo for Kevin Bacon to keep up with the beat.
- INXS then returned to the stage to perform Suicide Blonde.
- Stuart Smalley then made his debut for the first installment of Daily Affirmation where Al Franken plays a self-help guru who is desperate to find serenity after being raised by alcoholic parent with the constant reminders to himself that, "He's good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people like him," enough to succeed, while freaking out the entire time that this is actually untrue and having to correct himself over and over again.
- We then went back to the Middle East to see a collection of soldiers sitting around the fire while Kevin Bacon sings a country tune called Cleaning My Rifle while actually cleaning his gun at the same time.
- Finally, Kevin Bacon closed the night by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with Special Report From Wayne's World where the two basement dwelling cable access hosts discuss their findings following 72-hour television watching binge using three TV to take in all of the news coverage since the official start of the first Persian Gulf War. This sketch highlights how we as American's used to watch these world events as if they were frivolous forms of entertainment as the two goofballs list off their favorite moments so far. Sure, we still watch the news as a source of entertainment but the genre has since switched from being something to laugh about into something to fear since these actions are no longer contained to some far off land. Of course, this being the opening sketch, all the jokes build to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Sting then officially opened the show with a monolog about his comedy debut. He attempted to be funny while sharing the circumstances of how this hosting situation came to be only to quickly give in to expectations leading him to bail out on the jokes and head over to the musical stage to perform the song All This Time.
- We then got a fake ad that took place in a British pub for Hedley And Wyche Toothpaste which promises that a tube of this sugar filmed tooth maintenance product is enough to last any jagged mouthed Brit's entire life.
- Elevator Fans was the classic sketch where Sting gets caught in an elevator with Kevin Nealon who plays a very big fan but is nervous while making small talk leading him to chime in from time to time singing the high notes to the song Roxanne. Dana Carvey then joins in and reacts the same exact way only he opts to sing the high notes to the song If You Love Somebody.
- The Sinatra Group was a musical parody of The McLaughlin Group hosted by Frank Sinatra who questions a collection of famous musical performers from the time about the current state of the music industry.
- This was followed by a segment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where Jack discusses his views on clowns and why he might be afraid of them.
- The Richmeister then made his debut where Rob Schneider introduced The Copy Guy who has nothing real to say so he fills any office silence by playfully repeating various forms of people's names while giving a play by play account of anyone "Making Copies," at the office copy machine that's located right next to his desk but has absolutely nothing to say whenever anyone attempts to make a genuine conversation.
- We then got another installment of Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey where this time Jack muses on how we would treat trees if they actually screamed while being chopped down.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Al Franken checked in from Baghdad as his one-man mobile unit character making fun of the green-hued coverage from all the night vision cameras being used to capture the bombs flying through the night sky. David Spade also dropped in for a segment that seemed to be the basis of his Hollywood Minute segment as he shares what's In And Out in Hollywood. Finally, Dennis wrapped up the news by sharing the mating habits of the dancing Coke can novelty gift that was super huge at the time.
- Sting then returned to the stage to perform Mad About You.
- Dr. Frankenstein's Monster was, of course, a parody of Frankenstein with Sting playing the part of the mad scientist and Phil Hartman revisiting the monster role who struggles to learn more than grunts and groans even with Sting's desperate attempt to act as not just the monster's creator but as his personal speech therapist as well. Though Phil Hartman's Frankenstein does eventually learn a few more words he remains to be an uncontrollable monster, especially whenever fire is involved.
- This was followed by yet another Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey segment where Jack shares how he explains rain to children.
- Coffee Talk then made its show debut with Mike Myers played Paul Baldwin who hosted a show where he talks to phone callers about things people would talk about in real life while sharing coffee while making fun of the Jewish New York accent. Though I remember the Coffee Talk lady always referencing her brother, I totally forgot that it all started out with Paul as the actual host.
- We then got one more Deep Thoughts By Jack Handey segment where Jack weighs out the most dangerous animal on the planet and comes to the conclusion that it's a shark on an elephant's back.
- Meeting Parents Flashback was a bizarre looking sketch based on the images I found on the internet but I couldn't find the actual clip anywhere.
- Sting then returned to the stage once again to perform Purple Haze.
- We then went to a filthy Irish gentlemen's club where we first met a grumpy stripper performing for a room full of men. After a few moments, the Emcee took to the stage to thank the stripper for her work before introducing the next act to the stage which happened to be Sting with some Bleak Poetry about growing up in Ireland. This doesn't go over well with the crowd especially since it turned out to be the last performance of the night. Soon after everyone left the bar, Sting is left alone with Mike Myers who played an old Irish guy with some advice on how to lighten up Sting's work which also didn't go over well.
- Finally, Sting closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with a parody of Godfather with "George Bush Sr." playing the role of Michael Corleone. The sketch makes fun of the restaurant scene where Michael retrieves a hidden gun from the bathroom to kill his competition playing off the fact that Bush was no longer seen as a wimp since he started to bully Iraq over Kuwait as we continued to build up to the lopsided Persian Gulf War. Only, in this case, the gun was hidden in the actual toilet and not the dry part of the tank, so when Bush went to shot Saddam the gun would not fire due to the water damage. This then led Bush to give up and rush out of the room while blaming Quayle for making this idiotic mistake. As always, this being the opening sketch, as soon as Bush leaves Saddam continues his meal while Joe Mantegna announced of, "Live from New York..."
- Joe Mantegna then officially opened the show with a more of a joke/sketch than a monolog about how people often mistake him for Joe Montana when only seeing or hearing his name. Before our host got too deep into what was set up to be a monolog he witnessed a father and son as they attempted to leave because they were expecting the football star. This leads Mantegna to take the kid backstage to sort things out where he slips into one of his mobster characters to convince the kid to stay and act happy by threatening to send out his men to take out Montana or even his dad if he doesn't cheer up and play along which works and leads to the show's beginning.
- Kevin Nealon then played New York Talk Radio host where the topic of the day is how dangerous New York has become. He then introduces Joe Mantegna as his guest who blames each victim as they call in to share the horrifying stories as if these violent actions are to be expected.
- This was followed by a parody of Nightline where Victoria Jackson played a wife who got a chance to talk to her husband, Joe Mantegna, via satellite being that he is stationed in Saudi Arabia getting ready for the war. This satellite call is treated like a long distance family call during the holidays where the phone gets passed around so often and so quickly that it's impossible to have anything close to a real conversation.
- Officer Miller then made his debut appearance where Phil Hartman plays a neighborhood cop/host of a kid's show where he attempts to dish out advice to the youth. While walking his beat he notices Chris Farley, who I think is supposed to be high school aged, as he sits on a stoop and smokes a cigarette which led him to share photos of smoke-damaged lungs. Though this first piece of advice is appropriate thing get a little twisted when the two get to talking about the birds and bees.
- Vanilla Ice then took to the stage to perform Ice Ice Baby.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, A. Whitney Brown dropped in for another Big Picture segment where he discusses the fact the Constitutionally, the president wasn't allowed to declare war and the ways in which this fact is slowly slipping away with the current Gulf Crisis expediting the change in the delegation of military power.
- I'm Chillin' was another reoccurring sketch to make its show debut with Chris Rock and Chris Farley teaming up to do a talk show sketch which is almost an urban version of Wayne's World with Rock as the host and Farley as the sidekick. In this opening installment, the two cable access hosts talk music before Rock shares The Mother Joke Of The Day.
- We then witnessed Joe Mantegna dictate a Complaint Letter to Jan Hooks who plays an old secretary type where Mantegna is so caught up in using fancy wording it takes dozens of drafts just to get through a paragraph that simply explained that a shipment he received had a damaged item and that he would like a refund.
- Bill Swerski's Super Fans also made its show debut with a bunch of Chicago sports fan sitting around in a bar bragging about their favorite football team which is, "Da Bearssss," while making crazy predictions for the game they're about to watch.
- Vanilla Ice then returned to the stage to perform Play That Funky Music.
- Insane Inventors was a PBS style sketch with Phil Hartman as the host who profiles Insane Inventors throughout history, focusing this week on Thomas Edison and the Wolfman who turned out to be more similar than you might think. In the world of the sketch, it turned out that the two ended up working together and though things started out tough the two eventually turned out to be quite the pair.
- We then went to Eddie "The Clot" O'Hanlon's Funeral where we celebrated the life of the late, greatest cut man from the world of boxing which led to many interesting tales from the boxer who were there to share their final goodbyes.
- Finally, Joe Mantegna closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with A Message From The President Of The United States where Dana Carvey as Bush Sr. is now filled with confidence as he shares his plans with Iraq following their invasion of Kuwait. This is after month and months of these messages making fun of Bush's desperation to defend the claims that he was a wimp during his run to become president. Of course, this being the opening sketch it eventually builds up to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Dennis Quaid then officially opened the show with a monolog about being nervous to host due to the fact that the show is live. He then goes on to joke about his nervous smile/grin then goes on to share an example of how the nervous tick has even ruined his audition for a role in The Last Temptation Of Christ and then goes on to throw to the show while displaying his nervous grin once again.
- We then got a fake ad for the album A Dysfunctional Family Christmas filled with parody Christmas tunes that joyfully share dysfunctional family issues that often come up during the holidays.
- This was followed by a parody of Sally Jessy Raphael with Jan Hooks as Sally and Narcoleptic Hunks as the topic, where Sally interviews Dennis Quaid, Phil Hartman, and Mike Myers who all play heartthrobs who randomly fall asleep throughout the interview only to instantly pick up where they left off the moment they wake up as if no time has passed at all.
- We then went to a sketch that seemed like it was a family having breakfast with Dennis Quaid as his parent but it turns out that this is not his but his ex's instead in this sketch entitled Family Loves Ex-Boyfriend where Victoria Jackson's parents and brother seem to love Dennis more than her even though he's dating another girl so it's not that they're trying to get the two back together.
- The Neville Brothers then took to the stage to perform Brother Jake.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Jon Lovitz's Annoying Man made a special visit to annoy Dennis Miller while wishing him a Merry Christmas leading Miller to yet at both Lovitz and his character for being on the show multiple times since quitting. Dana Carvey's Grumpy Old Man character also dropped in to share the miseries of the Christmas season back in his day while also proclaiming, "That's the way it was AND WE LIKED IT.
- Massage Students was a sketch that made fun of massage school with Dennis Quaid as a Hippie Dippy teacher who is teaching a course through some sort of extended education program as it seems everyone who is there doesn't seem to want to take on massage as a professional practice but are more just a bunch of randos who there for weird reason, like a pair of swings who just want to hook up, as well as another couple where the wife can't stand being touched so the husband thinks this might help kickstart the physical aspect of their relationship and an old man who's just there because the class was cheap and available.
- Renegade Pilot was a sketch that sort of parodied Top Gun only with Dennis Quaid as a crazy pilot who likes to show off his piloting skills during a rill. It turns out that he's not only crazy when it comes to the maneuvers that he puts the jet through, he's also crazy enough to invest in shady stocks, put tin foil in the microwave, let his girlfriend cut his hair as well as many other highly questionable tasks while screaming like a maniac and continuing to control the jet at the same time, ignoring the demands to land by the tower.
- Sprockets then returned for its first installment of the season where Dieter hosted a Christmas episode of his show, sharing "German holiday traditions" including a "traditional song" and a German Santa played by Dennis Quaid and finish the show by introducing Black Pete who is a mythical Christmas troublemaker who plays tricks on the bad girls and boys.
- The Neville Brothers then returned to the stage to perform River of Life.
- Schillervision Theatre returned for another short film that felt like it would fit in with Adult Swim filled with lots of quick cuts that don't stay on topic. At first, we are promised a Christmas film but then quickly jump to a commercial for a hair yarmulke before jumping back to the short film that simply has kids running to the Christmas tree while closing credits play which is then quickly followed by an ad for an upcoming New Year's special where the Time Square Apple attacks the host and goes on to terrorize the world.
- We then got another fake ad for a fake album, this one is a collection of country songs called The Specialty Songs Of Cal McLane Jr. where he boasts about America's ability to bully the rest of the world into seeing things our way.
- This was followed by the debut of deep thoughts with a quick silly insight about parachuting.
- Finally, Dennis Quaid closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with an Editorial Reply From Mr. Subliminal where he replies to a story in the news about the building tension in the Middle East due to the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait. Though Kevin Nealon speaks of wanting peace his subliminal side wants all-out war and is also the side that sneaks in the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Tom Hanks the officially opened the show by getting officially inducted into the Five-Timers Club bringing on the birth of acknowledging those who have hosted for the fifth time. This starts with a quick monolog where Tom Hanks explains his accomplishment before heading back to the actual "Club" where Conan O'Brien is there, as almost a butler, to take his jacket in exchange for the Five-Timers robe. Paul Simon is the first to welcome Hanks, which is a little off because Paul is only technically a member because you have to include his musical guest appearance to get him up to and past the five-time count. Paul then calls to Steve Martin who joins in with the congratulating and explanation of rules. Elliot Gould is the next Five-Timers member to welcome Hanks to the club. Unfortunately, there is no mention of either Candice Bergen, who is the first female Five-Timer or Buck Henry who is actually the first host to accomplish the five-time feat.
- Unpleasant Stimuli was a sketch that took place during a family breakfast where Tom Hanks drinks some bad milk and the rest of the family has to give it a taste to validate that it's actually bad. This same chain of events happens with some bad fish from the night before as well as everyone touching Chris Farley's post-workout sweaty, sitting on a barely exposed nail, smelling the kitty litter and ending with everyone falling down the basement entry after Farley discovers a loose stair.
- Game Beaters was a game show sketch with Phil Hartman as host who asks contestants history questions and though Tom Hanks chimes in to answer, he instantly forgets the question that was asked as it turns out this is actually another installment of Mr. Short-Term Memory where Tom Hanks forgets anything and everything after a couple of seconds making for a very frustrated host.
- Edie Brickell And The New Bohemians then took to the stage to perform Woyaho.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Dana Carvey dropped in as Dennis Miller with Tom Hanks as Dennis Miller as well and the trio sang a rendition of Jingle Bells, working on many of Dennis's quirks.
- The Global Warming Christmas Special was parody Christmas special hosted by "Carl Sagan" that made fun of a Christmas season in a world without any snow but mainly this is just another excuse for the cast to show off some random impression which is most often the case with the holiday special genre of sketch.
- The P. Whipped talk show sketch then made its debut with Jan Hooks as the host who talks to men about their relationship issues leading to the sound effect of a cat's meow and a whipping sound whenever they share examples of how pussy whipped they are by their girlfriends.
- Sabra Shopping Network was a sketch that parodied The Home Shopping Network with Tom Hanks playing an Armenia pitchman who aggressively pushes electronic gadgets to the shoppers who call in, making fun of the "my friend" phrase using salesman type even though he never says "my friend" even one in the sketch which leads me to guess that wasn't a commonplace stereotype at the time.
- Edie Brickell And The New Bohemians then returned to the stage to perform He Said.
- Double-Takes had a family sit-com style start as Tom Hanks returned home from work and every time his wife, Victoria Jackson, informed him with any news he would repeat what she said once the take a moment to register what was said only to repeat it a second time sounding shocked by the information. He then went to a psychiatrist to work out the issue which only made things worse as he struggled to hold back his surprised second reaction which simply comes across as weird.
- A. Whitney Brown's Christmas Tale was one of the few if not only sketch where A. Whitney Brown got a segment to himself outside of the news where he talks about his Christmas traditions in a funny tale about killing, dressing and displaying a Christmas tree using terms to make the tree sound human making for a horrific sounding Christmas night.
- Finally, Tom Hanks closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with the return of Church Chat where the Church Lady badgered Saddam Hussein about his connection to SATAN following the early stages of his invasion of Kuwait as we continued to build up to the first Persian Gulf War. The Church Lady also brings in John Goodman who plays her mother who looks exactly the same only twice the size and the two double team the Iraqi leader over his connections with the dark side. Of course, this being the opening sketch, all of this built up to the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- John Goodman then officially opened the show with a monolog about his accomplishments since last hosting the show, including landing the starring role in a few movies, continued success on the show Roseanne, and the fact that Tom Arnold had him fire, only to be refired, then fired and rehired once again. His final crowning achievement was the fact that his daughter was recently born. This final announcement led to Goodman's impression of his newborn girl.
- We then got a repeat of the fake commercial for Bad Idea Jeans from earlier in the season where a group of guys discussed their bad choices while preparing for a basketball game over various shots of their pants.
- Annoying Traits was a sketch that took place in a convenience store where everyone involved is either Mr., Ms., or Mrs., followed by the annoying trait that they're known for and many have multiple names depending on what annoying trait is being put out on display.
- Jagger Ties The Knot was a sketch that parodied Mick Jagger's wedding to Jerry Hall and how Mick is still nervous after nearly a decade and a half together as well of the birth of two kids.
- Player-With-Yourselves-Club was a parody of the Player's Club ads that used to star Kojak. Of course, all they simply did was add the "With Yourself" to the company name to turn the ad for a "fancy" credit/club card into a sketch about masturbation.
- Faith No More then took to the stage to perform Epic.
- The McLaughlin Group then made its debut to the show. This is a panel talk show sketch that parodies the real talk show with the same name with Dana Carvey playing McLaughlin who aggressively controls the political conversation that he has with his guests.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, David Spade made his news debut where he compared himself with Kuwait being that he was a tiny kid who was bullied by his old/bigger brother who he equated to Iraq with his mom being the USA who would step in to get everyone in line.
- Food Chewing was a sketch were Victoria Jackson introduces John Goodman to her family over dinner where the main course is a huge steak. Being that this is such a chewy meal the introductory conversation is filled with slow moments from everyone having to wait to swallow each bite before being able to continue to speak.
- Wayne's World then returned for the first time this season. In this installment, the two basement dwelling cable access hosts have moved to Garth's living room for Wayne's World After Hours where they plan to review NC17 films while Garth's parents were out since content containing the brand new rating wouldn't be allowed in Wayne's basement. After the setup, the two review Madonna's controversial new music video Justify My Love making fun of it as it plays while also getting turned on. Just when it gets to the good part, John Goodman enters as the neighborhood cop who got a report of the broadcast and was there to ruin all the fun.
- Faith No More then returned to the stage to perform From Out of Nowhere.
- We then went to a general store from the old west where we met a couple of frontiersmen and their rough and tumble sons. We also met Davy Crockett And His Son who's a total nerd/genius who doesn't get the same respect because he uses his brains over his brawn, that is until he saved the other sons from a mountain lion by using a hypnosis technic that he read about in a book which impressed the two boy's father which is the only reason Davy Crockett switched his outlook and actually because proud of his child.
- It's Pat then made its show debut where Julia Sweeney introduced the world to her classic androgynous character who is based on a pair of movie theater managers that worked for the same movie theater chain as where I worked when I first moved up to Seattle since she apparently worked there as well while she was attending college.
- Finally, John Goodman closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with Live With Regis And Kathie Lee where the morning talk show hosts check in from Saudi Arabia where they are entertaining the troops from the first Persian Gulf War, keeping in mind that this first Gulf conflict was treated like it was frivolous and fun since the battle was so lopsided with distinct goals to where we knew when the war was done. In the actual sketch "Regis" and "Kathie Lee" just goof around in the Middle East in the playful tone that they were known for, building up to the announcement or, "Live from New York..."
- Dennis Hopper then officially opened the show with a monolog about how excited he was to host the show for the second time but was unsure why they had him back. Before he could get too deep into his question he got interrupted by the host of This Is Your Life as the monolog turned into more of a sketch that explored Dennis' life through this through this bait and switch booking/surprise, only Dennis doesn't remember anything due to all the drugs.
- This was followed by a fake ad for the Nikey Turkey from the time where pump-able shoes were all the crazy so this was a Thanksgiving Turkey that pumped up using Nikes shoe tongue pump technology.
- Toonces then returned for a sketch that shared his Dreams where the driving cat dreams about supervising a bunch of baby chicks, only to be woken in a dream within a dream right before his final driving test. He then takes his owners out for a drive where they learn he can also talk. As always, even in the dream Toonces eventually drives the car over a cliff, this time while avoiding the local bully, who was played by Chris Farley who was chasing the car with a bomb.
- We then got a parody of Dennis Hopper's The River's Edge character only instead of having just one inflatable lover he has a house full of Inflatable Dolls and has invited a bunch of friends over in an effort to hook them all up with dates only everyone is mainly interested in Dennis' Doll. Fortunately, he's not the same exact psychopath from The River's Edge or he may have killed Kevin Nealon for popping the doll of his dreams.
- Paul Simon then took to the stage to perform The Obvious Child.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Chris Rock dropped in for another segment where he discussed the problems with minimum wage highlighting that it means companies would pay you less if they legally could meanwhile it's still not a livable source of income only to have taxes added on top.
- Liaison Mocking was a sketch where Julia Sweeney and Jan Hooks have a water cooler chat about Julia's crazy antics at the company party where she hooked up with one of her coworkers. It turns out that Paul Simon is the coworker in question and when Jan leaves the two alone to talk the entire staff ends up in the breakroom, including Jan to mock the secret couple behind their backs as they discuss how they want to handle it. Eventually, Victoria Jackson and Dennis Hopper also enter the room and Victoria announces to the entire room that she hooked up with Dennis at the same event and no one treats this like it any big deal at all.
- This was followed by a Civil War sketch where we see what really went down just prior to a famous photo filled with Southern Soldiers, where we learn the photo shoot was as unorganized as a casual family photo where the photographer has to herd a bunch of cats who all have different views on how they wanted to pose.
- Paul Simon then returned to the stage to perform Proof.
- What Animal Were You Raised By? was a talk show sketch where Phil Hartman interviews Dennis Hopper who was raised by apes and flamingos but not at the same time. It turns out his plane crashed in the jungle when he was a kid and he was the sole survivor. The apes were the first to take him in only they decided to build a plane that also crashed and once again he was the only one to live. This is when he was adopted by the flamingos who also tried to build a plane but their engineering was so poor they barely were able to get off the ground but they still all died because Hopper was originally raised by a bunch of hunters and was instinctually driven to kill any bird that he happened to see fly by. This is when we learn that he was also raised by Dung Beetles but is too ashamed to delve all that deep into the details. Keep in mind, we learn all this while Dennis Hopper show absolutely zero traits that he had even ever been out in the wild, let alone had been raised by various groups of animals.
- Schillervision Theater then made its debut taking over the Schiller Reel series of short films. This week's short film called Sudden Pressure that is quickly interrupted by a fake ad for the man bra. We return to the movie to see the actual scene play out where a man rushes to the restroom after being struck by a sudden urge. This scene is even shorter than the ad and is followed by a preview of next week's installment where we are promised a film called Gandhi With The Wind.
- Stan Duffy's Gambling To Win was an infomercial of a sketch where Kevin Nealon taught us the tricks of making money at gambling where you set a limit of the maximum amount that your willing to lose as well as a walk away amount to stick to if you do manage to find that you're winning. He also introduces the idea of free casino drinks and after that, it doesn't take long for him to break from his original conservative/valid plan to either walk away a winner or lose an acceptable amount. The sketch continues on until Nealon has taken out a shady loan and is betting the bare minimum just to keep getting free drinks as the infomercial evolves to be more of a PSA against gambling while intoxicated.
- Paul Simon then returned to the stage once again to perform Late in the Evening.
- Finally, Dennis Hopper closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with another Message From The President Of The United States where once again Dana Carvey played George Bush Sr. to try and boast about his half-assed accomplishments in an effort to boost his dropping number in the polls. This is still before the first Gulf War set off so his threats to Saddam is his tool of choice to solidify the nation through fear. As always, this being the opening sketch, it ended with the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Jimmy Smits then officially opened the show with a monolog about how he's excited to be back in his hometown hosting the show and is even more excited to represent the Hispanic portion of the crowd and to celebrate he goes on to share a story while Don Pardo translates it into Spanish.
- This was followed the classic fake ad for the Chia Head where Chia scientist have created a way to grow chia seeds on balding men's heads to help and boost their confidence.
- Game Challengers was a game show sketch with Phil Hartman as the host of a game where Mike Myers plays white corporate type who plays against Jimmy Smits as a Native American for the chance to win ancient Native American artifacts with each question being heavily weighted in the favor of Myers who wins everything in sight. The sketch ended with Smits taking Hartman as a hostage so that the people of his tribe can forcefully take what is rightfully theirs in a way that was sloppy in delivering the sketches message.
- NBC News Employees was a sketch that made fun of how white people go overboard in their use of Spanish accents when it comes to delivering the news. Meanwhile, Smits enters the scene as a new addition to the crew and is super annoyed as he witnesses his new coworkers take this over-pronunciation of his people's words way too far.
- Mike Myers' Simon character then made his debut to the show and we got to witness the neglected son of a British businessman as he optimistically shares his drawings that show his view from the tub during their travels around the world. As always, the sketch ends when Simon gets done with tub time because he's been in so long that he's started to develop "prune hands."
- World Party then took to the stage to perform Way Down Now.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Jan Hooks checked in from the New York Marathon to catch the runner who came in last place. This runner turned out to be Chris Farley who crossed the finish line with a beer in hand six days after the race started only to find out Mike Myers was actually behind him.
- Date With A Ditz was Julia Sweeney's live debut to the show following a quick video clip of her in the NBC News Employees sketch from earlier in the night. In this sketch, Julia plays Smits' ditz of a first date who rambles through random stories on what is supposed to be a romantic encounter, at least in the mind of Smits.
- The Dark Side With Nat X then made its debut to the show where Chris Rock plays a Black Panther talk show host who's in charge of the only fifteen-minute talk show on TV, "WHY," because the white man couldn't handle any more. In this installment, he interviews Jimmy Smits about racial relations on LA Law and can't believe the cast and crew actually work together in harmony. Being that racial harmony is the last thing Nat X wants to hear, he kicks Smits off the air and brings in the white boxer Gerry Cooney, mainly to show him getting beat up by his black opponent before ending the show for the night.
- Two-Faced Doormen was Rob Schneider's official debut as a cast member even though he's already made a couple cameo appearance when he was just technically a writer. In the sketch, Rob and Kevin Nealon play two doormen who are nice to the residents' faces only to talk trash about themselves when no one else is around, kind of the same way Tom Hanks and Jon Lovitz would dis themselves in the Girl Watchers: A Go-Go sketches from the past.
- We then got a bizarre sketch where it took me a moment to register what was going on because it took place in a Manhattan Mobile Home Park where the houses are stood on their side to cram more units into the expensive New York real estate. To add to the confusion, there was a technical error where the title image wasn't displayed until a couple minutes into the sketch which would have prepared me for the crazy perspective/main source of comedy in the sketch.
- World Party then returned to the stage to perform Ship of Fools.
- Verbal Reversals was a sketch where Jimmy Smits and Dana Carvey play detectives who are partners and Jimmy contradicts every single thing that Dana says not to be argumentative but to come across as sounding deep.
- Finally, Jimmy Smits closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with Dirty Square Dancing which, of course, was a parody of Dirty Dancing only with a Square Dance being the venue for the film's climax, only the sketch was more about Dirty Square Dancing as opposed to actually spoofing the movie. This being the opening sketch, as always, it ended with the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Patrick Swayze then officially opened the show with a monolog about how the last time he was in New York he was shot and killed mixing reality with his role in the movie Ghost before transitioning into a quick song and dance, with his wife, before throwing to the first set of commercials.
- Pumping Up With Hans And Franz then made its season debut where the muscle-bound brothers perform their usual routine only this time they mix things up with Patrick Swayze who is promoting his fitness book that deals with flexibility over size which really messes with the muscle men's minds and leads Franz to question his sexuality.
- Ghost II was a parody sequel to Ghost where Swayze witnesses Demi Moore's character's disgusting personal habits while she is unaware that his spirit is watching. She ends up being so gross that Swayze's ghost ends up wanting to have nothing to do with her.
- We then got a fake ad from Sam Walton, the owner of Walmart who puts forth an offer to the American voters where he will pay anyone one hundred thousand bucks to write their representatives to push for a positive vote that would favor the ultra-rich corporate class.
- Super Feud was a fake a for an album where two Latin superstars battle over who is more significant amongst their Central and South American fans with songs filled with brags about themselves while dissing their competition.
- We then got a follow up to the Sam Walton Offer where the owner of Walmart resent his offer because he was thinking way too grand and made a new offer where he would send any letter senders a hat like the one he was wearing on his very own head.
- Mariah Carey then took to the stage to perform Vision Of Love.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, A. Whitney Brown dropped in for another Big Picture moment about how horrible our choices were for that year's mid-term elections which sounded an awful lot like our current problem only way less extreme.
- This was followed by the classic Chippendales sketch where Patrick Swayze and Chris Farley have a dance-off for the final spot in the Chippendales dance squad.
- We then got a parody of The Tonight Show where we see the end of an interview with "one of the girls from The Partridge Family," where Johnny is obsessed with her childhood career while she wants to focus on the present. This was followed by a routine by Arsenio Hall, played by Chris Rock, and the two talk show hosts compare their shows since Johnny was just learning about his competition, highlighting how out of touch the old-timey talk show host got toward the end of his career.
- White Trash Bed And Breakfast was a sit-com sketch following the family and guests of a low-rent vacation home that mainly plays off of redneck cliches and stereotypes.
- Mariah Carey then returned to the stage to perform Vanishing.
- Mouse Trap Seminar was a sketch that as the title suggest follows a group of students at a mouse trap themed seminar where the main focus seems to be how these humans can avoid getting hurt by buying and eating cheese from the store instead of giving into their urges and trying to steal from their traps.
- Finally, Patrick Swayze closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with Kevin Nealon and Victoria Jackson entering George Steinbrenner's dressing room to wish him luck for the night only to find the old coach taking a nap on the couch. We then travel into the host's head for a sketch called Steinbrenner's Dream where the Yankee's coach is in the World Series playing every position on the team. He then wakes in a panic to announce, "Live from New York..."
- George Steinbrenner then officially opened the show with a monolog about how there are two types of host for Saturday Night Live, entertainers, and beloved figured from other walks of life and how he falls into the latter category, partially to lower the crowds expectations but more importantly he uses this as evidence to show that he is actually beloved.
- Middle-Aged Man then made his triumphant return to show Dana Carvey and Chris Rock how to jump-start a car in the sketch's intro. He then goes on to advise Jan Hooks and Victoria Jackson on how to tell if Jan's husband is actually having an affair with the help of his new sidekick named Drinking Buddy who is played by Chris Farley.
- We then went to a Convenience Store where there are more cashiers than customers. Phil Hartman plays the supervisor who walks the floor then heads back to the manager's office to talk to George Steinbrenner who plays the store manager, about cutting down on the staff. This apparently took place when Steinbrenner was big on firing his staff and players because he seemed to make a lot of inside jokes about how horrible a manager would have to be to fire anyone even if they aren't working for what's best for the team.
- Slapped By Beaver Tails was a talk show sketch where Mike Meyers interviews a panel of guests who were all slapped by beavers.
- We then got a fake ad for the Winston-McCauley Funeral Home whose biggest promise is that they guarantee that no one from their staff will have sex with the dead bodies that they prepare for burial.
- The Time then took to the stage to perform Jerk Out.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Chris Rock returned to talk about the upcoming Holyfield vs Douglas fight and how he was surprised Holyfield was favored to win considering Douglas beat Tyson which was unthinkable at the time. This was followed by a bit of his stand-up routine that covered various unrelated topic which he calls himself out for by the end of the bit. "Tom and Roseanne" also checked in via satellite to discuss the recent lawsuit where the couple was suing a tabloid magazine for an incident they were involved with at the time.
- Attack Of The Colossal Lincoln was a Godzilla-like sketch where the Lincoln monument comes to life to destroy Washington D.C. due to the fact that the Government was shutting down following a disagreement over how to handle the budget.
- This was followed by a fake Slim-Fast Ad where George Steinbrenner is teamed up with a bunch of dictators to share their weight loss stories thanks to the Slim-Fast product. About halfway through the sketch, George breaks the scene to question why he is being aligned with this group of evil leaders.
- The Time then returned to the stage to perform Chocolate where Morris Day finished the performance by dropping the f-bomb when asking "Where the fuck did this chicken come from... I ordered the ribs," to finish out a routine that was worked into the song.
- "What Was I Thinking?" was a panel discussion show with Phil Hartman as the host who asks his famous guests what was going through their heads when they made notorious bad choices in their careers. His guest included Shelley Long who left Cheers, Walter Mondale who promised to raise taxes as part of his presidential campaign, and George Steinbrenner who got breast implants, in the world of the sketch.
- We then went to a fancy restaurant for a sketch called Fancy Meals where Steinbrenner is on a double date where the two men end up battling over who is going to pay the tab and Steinbrenner eventually wins but isn't gracious at all about his victory as he treats everyone else at the table like a bunch of mooches for not even attempting to chip in.
- We then went to Steinbrenner's office for a sketch called Harassing A Female Reporter, where Jan Hooks is there to complain about being harassed in the locker room during an interview only to be harassed by George as well.
- The Vision Of Van Gogh was a parody profile of the famous painter that shares the secret to his style impressionist style was due to the fact that he couldn't see all that well.
- Finally, George Steinbrenner closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.
The Wicker Breakdown:
- This week's show started with a fake ad where the owner of the Patriots at the time was pitching The Classic Bitch And Lezbo Electric Shavers to add a female line to the Remington brand of products which he apparently also owned. As always, this being the opening sketch, it eventually ended with the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
- Susan Lucci then officially opened the show with a monolog about how the only thing that would be better than hosting Saturday Night Live would be to finally win an Emmy. She then went on to explain the differences between her and the character she portrays on All My Children, which is a show that I've never seen so I didn't get the nuances to her references. This eventually led to a flashback where Susan was continually taunted behind the scenes by all the cast and crew who have all won multiple Emmys to where there were so many award statues that the flashback ended with an Emmy fight with the many trophies being playfully thrown around.
- This was followed by a parody of Live With Regis And Kathie Lee which is a show that I am actually familiar with so I got all the nuanced jokes so I found it sort of funny. That said, if I wasn't aware of the show being referenced, this would be another case where I felt the parody was too close to being realistic that the jokes weren't all that funny.
- All My Luggage was a parody of All My Children where they parodied the soap opera style to an instance in luggage claim where customer service has to break the news to Susan Lucci that they managed to lose her bags which leads to an extremely melodramatic response.
- Great Love Stories was a sketch that profiled unexpected love stories and shared the tale of a mobster who fell in love with a woman after he threw acid in her face by mistake since the actual target was her neighbor. We also met a man who fell in love with a girl after realizing he and his father were keeping her locked in the basement as a prisoner, as well as a female reporter who fell in love with a football player after being flashed in a locker room when she went back for an after game interview. Finally, the sketch ended with a preview of next week's show where we witnessed a redneck who fell in love with a camping city boy after killing off his girlfriend.
- Hothouse Flowers then took to the stage to perform Give It Up.
- Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, Mr. Subliminal returned to the show to share his views on the new NC-17 rating while sneaking in his real opinions with his subliminal style of reporting. Chris Rock also made his first news appearance to discuss the difference between white and black crimes and how white people tend to commit the crazier crimes to land them on death row while black people stick to the more traditional breaking of rules. Finally, the new ended with a visit from Dana Carvey's Grumpy Old Man character who shared his generation's struggles from when they were youths but they weren't actual struggles because "That's the way things were and they LIKED IT!"
- Game Breakers was a game show sketch hosted by Phil Hartman where Susan Lucci wins every round by flirting with Phil while constantly claiming that her buzzer is broken or other excuses to steal the win from Jan Hooks who's dressed down and actually does have all of the answers. The conflict between the two contestants eventually turned the sketch into yet another soap opera parody.
- Her First Period was a sketch was Victoria Jackson experiences her first period during a family event and has to ask her mom, Susan Lucci, for advice only to get extremely awkward answers to her questions since they treated Jackson's adult size as the size of the twelve-year-old child she's portraying as well as the fact that Lucci's character is downright crazy.
- I Will Not Cry was a sketch where Mike Myres plays the sensitive one amongst a group of female coworkers and he has to fight his tears during a farewell party at work. We eventually learn that he's not even leaving the company or even the building and that he's just moving to another department but is still super emotional to the point where he kills himself. While up in heaven, he meets with Jesus where he continues to cry his eyes out over missing the girls from work.
- Hothouse Flowers then returned to the stage to perform I Can See Clearly Now.
- M.C. Hammer's The Sound Of Music was as the title suggests a parody ad for The Sound Of Music with M.C. Hammer in the starring role.
- Finally, Susan Lucci closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.