Good morning crickets. Welcome to day number two-hundred-ninety-eight of Operation Achieve Anything. It’s weird how just a few days ago, I shared how I was starting to feel a bit more mentally balanced from all of the healthy choices that I’ve been making lately. In the past, I’ve also admitted that I feel more comfortable in either extreme because my upbringing has me more comfortable in chaos even though all that I want is inner peace and peace in general. The chaos that sends me on the highs and lows is, more often than not, external; hears that I will never figure out how to gain enough confidence to make a living of my own work, whether or not my family and friends hate me. Being balanced is the worst because the sadness that comes during the calm stems from internal pains.
Though out the update about feeling balanced I shared how much I credited the extra sleep since I have started to average seven hours a night as opposed to the usual four that I’ve been getting for the past few years. I also said that the balance felt nice and allowed me to start to heal real issues going on in my head and how I might feel a bit down but was far from depressed. That is until it was time to go to bed. After sharing that note, I started to listen to more political content because, by habit, I seek the external when I feel hurt.
By the time I lied down to go to bed, I was going to post a Tweet about how my depression reminds me of old-timers with arthritis who know a storm is coming based on how their pains act up, only my depression acts up whenever there’s any sign of an election. I was just getting over getting as affected by any random political talk that I’d come across through the day, but after submerging myself for one evening, I already needed a break. The next morning, right after I wrote yesterday’s Daily Breaker post and started to see all this nonsense about all these bombs. This left me wondering if my depression is more linked to these types of events considering this happened the day after I gave in to getting caught up on the news after months of avoiding it, almost, altogether.
With close to five years worth of these daily post, I’ll have to look back at the dates of major news event to see how I was feeling the week prior to any activity that causes this media madness. Now I’m depressed and caught up in this political sport that more sports entertainment than legitimate news with both sides accusing the other side of pushing an agenda instead of actually focusing on the news. This is why I watch both sides when I do give in to this nonsense and every time, after about an hour or two of say stay calm. The second a news channel figures out their angle, that call to keep calm goes right out the window, and the story instantly evolves to be more about pushing opinion than focusing on the actual event. BOTH SIDES DO THIS, I know because I watch.
Maybe, someday, I’ll get around to actually doing the research mentioned above, but until then, I think it’s now time for me to start discussing yesterday’s assignment where I was supposed to start to contemplate ways to keep training to get to the point of excellence at the skills that are part of my goal. As I said yesterday, not only do I feel that at close to day three-hundred, it’s late in the game to still be searching for your interest and actual goal, but this lesson has already been recycled twice before. Once, when the book pushed the importance of continuing to learn whether or not you're in school, and again where I was told to always be learning, you’re never too old to stop learning.
As I’ve pointed out in these past assignments, this blog itself was created as a ten-year training program to break the bad habits that I developed when my primary interest was writing screenplays. When I switched my medium of choice and attempted to write my first novel, my standard prose was so stunted from my screenwriting style. Where you must be more tight with the use of your words since their meant to be a blueprint for the screen with only a few dozen people who actually read the thing and care more about the actions and dialog than the words being used to convey these elements. Not only that but I’ve been enrolled in several online courses ever since I discovered easily affordable one-off classes that are actually good. Though I’ve never been good at traditional schools, I’ve always loved to learn.
Today’s assignment is another one of discovery where I’m now supposed to figure out gifts one more time. It’s writing, the answer to all of this is writing. I’ve answered this question ten billion times throughout this entire book. At least once every other week this book has an assignment asking me to explore my interest. Again, I get it in a self-help book for those who are completely lost, but that is not the book that I but… well… apparently, it is.
Oh well, I’ll figure out another way to share just how much I love to write, whether or not I’m good at it, and I’m committed to working through my many flaws until I can figure it out. Until then it’s now time for me to finish this one off as usual by saying, good day and good luck to you and all of your projects.
Talk to you soon.
The Wicker Breaker
P.S. Below are links to my novel, which I plan to promote as part of Operation Achieve Anything, as well as a link to where you can buy the book that is providing the structure to this project in case you would like to purchase it in order to play along.