Good morning Crickets. It’s now officially day number sixty-five of Operation Achieve Anything, which happens to be a Tuesday, and I’m just now starting to feel better following this weekend’s booze-filled bender. I know I keep bringing this up but I just can’t get over how long it takes me to recover now that drinking’s no longer a daily routine.

This topic also plays into yesterday’s assignment that was still dealing with personal authenticity, in that, in the past, I used to think of my authentic self as a drunk when really I was just self-medicating in an effort to keep my social anxiety under control. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not using booze to pass the blame but it did/does fuel the character of me that I want you to see as referenced in Sunday’s quote.

If I’m being honest, I wish I was still the daily drunk that I started to develop when I turned eighteen, who set out to live an interesting life no matter how fucked up it grew to be. Those these days brought with them plenty of pain, I really miss all of the laughter since I now just chuckle from time to time instead of continually giggling like a crazy person.

I used to live carefree as I bounce through life collecting memories to inspire my writing in the process. I always had a fantasy that I’d be a drug and booze filled prose slinger like Hunter S. Thompson in that I liked to through myself into the story and then blur the lines of fiction and reality as I attempt to get out my message. I never thought I would ever be as good as the Gonzo journalist and was never as into heavy drugs but the idea of bending reality and fiction in various ways has always been appealing to me.

Now, I feel like I’ve collected enough experiences o keep me busy for a while, to where I could rework a couple long format stories a year and still die before sharing all of my experiences. I’m sure I will want to collect new stories at some point in my life but for right now, while I’m still trying to get my head straight following the major, mid-life crisis that really kicked my ass just a few years ago.

Though I feel much better mentally, whenever I’m recovering from one of my monthly/bimonthly drinking binges, I inevitably start thinking about death as I deal with gut rot, and other hangover pains. I know this post might go against the books attempt to get me to focus on more of the positive aspect of life but yesterday’s assignment was about revisiting my completed assignments and gauging how authentic I’m being which would have to involve at least some negative thoughts or else it wouldn’t be me.

Today’s assignment is almost the same, only instead of referencing past assignments, I’m supposed to observe my actions throughout the day and not how often I am honest with both how I handle my thoughts and how I interact with others. Once again, I get the idea but it would be nice for the assignment to have just a little more direction so that it feels less of a repeat of yesterday’s task instead of just feeling reworded.

As always, I’ll be back tomorrow in order to check in with my update on how I handle today’s assignment where I will ramble on with more personal truths since I’ve never felt I’ve struggled with being honest. Until then, it’s now that time for me to sign off my usual way and say, good day and good luck to you and all of your projects.

Talk to you soon.

Sincerely,

The Wicker Breaker

P.S. Below are links to my novel, which I plan to promote as part of Operation Achieve Anything, as well as a link to where you can buy the book that is providing the structure to this project in case you would like to purchase it in order to play along.