SNL: S34E01... HOST: MICHAEL PHELPS... DATE: SEPTEMBER 13, 2008
/The Wicker Breakdown:
This week's show started with A Non-Partisan Message From Sarah Palin And Hillary Clinton that brought Tina Fey as Sarah Palin together with Amy Poehler and Hillary Clinton to deliver a joint message about sexism on the campaign trail despite the fact that they still clearly had disparaging feelings toward one another. Throughout the sketch, Palin kept making claims that could set women back while Hillary could barely contain her bitterness about losing out to Barack Obama which seemed to be the only reason she agreed to team up in the first place. Of course, with this being the opening sketch, it eventually led to the announcement of, “Live from New York…”
Michael Phelps then officially opened the show with a monolog about his eight gold medal record-breaking run at the latest Olympics games. He then went on to explain the endorsement deals that were coming in and how he was trying to avoid making hasty decisions as to which deals he’ll take on to avoid being the next William Shatner who joined our host to defend himself and also promote Priceline upon hearing his name. We also met Amy Poehler who was portraying Phelps’s mom for a marketing pitch that didn’t last long before our host’s real mom joined in to throw to the actual show. Throughout the entire monolog, you could also see Guy Fieri’s head in the audience whenever they’d cut to the crowd, but he didn’t end up having anything to do with this appearance.
Quiz Bowl had a family of home-schooled kids up against a group of public school students for a high school based quiz show. These home-school kids turned out to be home taught for kooky reasons leaving them to have crazy beliefs about history and science including the belief in a war between man and dinosaurs, but they still knew more than the publicly educated idiots who played their competitors.
This was followed by a fake ad for The Jar Glove which was a product that offered a more viable solution to opening tight jars that doesn’t involve accidental homicide, complete with examples of the right and wrong way to use this and similar products.
Locker Room Motivation had Will Forte as a swimming coach who tried to inspire his team of swimmers to come back from their impending loss by playing Dancing Plants which sounded like a thinking song for a game show that the team listened to as they thought. That is until Forte was swept up by the music and put on quite a show.
Craig And Stacia had Bill Hader and Amy Poehler as oblivious business owners who didn’t see how annoyed their employees were with their frumpy daughter, Kristen Wiig/Stacia and her gangly cousin Michael Phelps/Craig. Wiig’s character was first introduced with Seth Rogen as her brother back last season when he was the host and Phelps was a cousin replacement, but the overall idea was still pretty much the same.
Lil Wayne then took to the stage to perform Got Money.
Once again, Amy Poehler and Seth Meyers gave us the news. This week, Will Forte dropped in as a new character named Alaska Pete who took offense to the media’s bias against fellow Alaskan, Sarah Palin. Fred Armisen also returned as his comic character who once again attempts and fails to create comedy directly from newspaper headlines. Andy Samberg then finished off the new as the character Cathy from the famous comic strip, as he as she fretted about her life.
The Charles Barkley Show had Kenan Thompson as the former basketball player turned parody talk show host who, in order to pay back a gambling debt and to interview Darrell Hammond as Bela Karolyi and Michael Phelps from a Las Vegas Wynn Casino’s daycare room. During the interview, we discover that the kid played all the roles on the TV crew because they were the only staff that Barkley could still afford.
We then got a parody ad for T-Mobile where Jason Sudeikis played a dad who gets in trouble with Kristen Wiig as the mom after agreeing with his son, Michael Phelps that his daughter, Casey Wilson’s friends are all really hot.
This was followed by another SNL Digital Short called Space Olympic where Andy Samberg sang about the unearthly fictional event while Michael Phelps and other castmates provided the visuals as they prepared for the space competition.
Pizzeria Uno feature newcomer Bobby Moynihan as a Pizzeria Uno waiter who attempted to take the order from Michael Phelps and Amy Poehler who were out on a date that was ruined by Moynihan’s obnoxious approach to customer service.
Lil Wayne then returned to the stage to perform Lollipop.
The Michael Phelps Diet shared the “fail-safe” weight-loss approach that suggested dieters eat as many calories as Michael Phelps during his peak training as if these dieters would then get the same results. The sketch ended with a surprise visit from the real Subway’s Jared who made a joke that knowing the future turned out to be a bit dark.
Finally, Michael Phelps closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.