Here we are at the end of another day… and I’m excited because I get to head off to bed earlier than usual… or… maybe get higher than usual… whatever ends up happening first… I don’t want to actually fall asleep this early… I’m getting used to waking at 5:00 in the AM again… but… I’m not fully adjusted… not that it matters… and this site is the closest thing that I have to a job… so I’ll take as long as I want…

Here we are at the end of yet another day of making progress…and I’m excited about the upcoming week… for one… I was finally able to buy the part to fix my computer… meaning… no more slow-ass emergency laptop to drive me nuts… I’ll have faster internet… and photoshop back…. so I’ll finally be able to play with the stylus that I got for my birthday… and to top things off… I’m treating myself to a new ergonomic keyboard!!!

Here we are at the end of another night… and boy howdy… I’m exhausted… I think it from the new pills that I’m on… that seem to make me feel better mentally… but physically… I feel weaker than usual… so I’m not sleepy tired but still feel spent…

It’s been a while since I’ve last checked in… because the task that I’ve been working on all week kept putting my brain into autopilot mode to the point where… by the end of the day… I can’t even drum up any stoner insights to ramble on about… I finished said task this afternoon… so I’m still half in autopilot mode… but I felt the need to check in since I’ll be starting a similar task on Monday…

Here we are at the end of not just another day… but also another week… and I’m excited that it’s the weekend… not that it really matters as to what I end up doing… but I like that everyone else seems to keep themselves better occupied when they don’t have school or work… I don’t have to babysit or have TV time… I just get to decompress from all of my weekday interactions...

Here we are at the end of another day and I can’t seem to come up with anything to say… because I’ve been too focused on marketing lately… since… if you’re not playing along… is currently my main focus as I attempt to monetize this site… so that this site will be nothing but fun moving forward… keeping in mind that my dream is to earn the equivalent of a full-time minimum-wage job organically through ads and what not… to never have to talk about needing a gig again…

Here we are at the end of another day… and… having learned from last night… I’m going to wait until I publish this post before I take my end of the night crazy pills… since they don’t make me sleepy in an interesting way… but get me sleepy in a way that I just want to go to bed… which is probably the best-case scenario… since I love to ramble when on meds that have the same effects of sleeping pills…

Here we are at the end of another day and I got back on the exercise bike tonight after taking the last two days off because of my non-birthday blues… I’m making myself go up five more minutes a day to punish myself for the time off… but then again… I was planning for the time increase… and don’t want to get in the habit of pushing myself harder as a negative… so I guess I’ll say that I’m rewarding myself with more fitness because it does lead to better sleep…

Here we are at the end of another day… where I’m enjoying some ooey-gooey butter cake to wrap up… technical Leap Year replacement birthday… day two… while also enjoying a fake beer to celebrate National Beer Day… since I’m still on a break from drinking until… at least… the end of the year… I’m really starting to feel better now that I’m done thinking about anything birthday… or at least I’ll be after tonight’s reset before I wake up in the morning…

Here we are at the end of another day… a day that is not actually my birthday… but at the same time… still sort of is as a Leap Year Kid… a day that turned out to be alright… because it was the first time in a while that I genuinely laughed really hard along with everyone in the room… while watching TV…. and for the reasons that I’m supposed to… and not me just laughing alone because I can help but notice every silly thing happening in the background while barely paying attention to the main content…

Here we are at the end of yet another day… and I’m just ready to go to bed… this week has been a rough one… with all of the issues getting drummed up by all the therapy appointments that I’ve had this week… I’m just burnt out emotionally… not to mention the depression that’s setting in with my birthday technically being tomorrow… but I don’t actually get one this year… as if it really matters…

Here we are at the end of another night and today’s appointment with the pill doctor started a bit strange because I was so in my head over the warning that I got about what I should and shouldn’t talk about with her during yesterday’s appointment with my new talk therapist… the way that she phrased what psychiatrist do and don’t like… made me feel like I was either going to be talking to a celebrity doctor who I shouldn’t look directly in the eye… or more likely what she doesn’t like about how I share information with her…

Here we are at the end of another day… and I’m growing more and more annoyed with how my therapy session went earlier today… which sucks because I’ve been very open to treatment ever since working with my coach from the Sanvello app that I’ve been using for my mental health… where I get to share my thoughts through my writing… since I’m terrible at verbalizing anything that’s not benign or a joke…

Here we are at the end of another night… where I learned this afternoon that the ear issue I’ve been dealing with actually is tinnitus… which I always thought was more of a whistle… and an entire range of sounds… mine just happens to sound like the frequency generated by some power lines… and still has a way to… somehow… amplify the pressure changes from things like helicopters and fans… or even the fan in my computer… to where it feels like the vibrating’s coming from inside my skull…

Here we are at the end of yet another day… and I’ve been thinking a lot about this article where I first heard of the term Toxic Positivity… without having to read the article… the term alone was enough to put a name on what I feel that my family suffers from… and why it’s so hard for me to get help for anything… I’m old enough that it’s my issue to resolve on my own… so I’m not here to point fingers… but after reading the article as well as several other resources on the subject… being raised this way really fucked me up…

Here we are at the end of yet another day… sorry that I skipped last night’s post… I took the night off to celebrate Single Task Day… which was the theme of yesterday’s 365 Days Or Marketing And Me Challenge… I was also busy discovering a new development in the drama with my left ear… and am now fully certain that it is the main source of the sensory issue that I’ve been dealing with recently…

Here we are at the end of yet another day… and I plan to take things easy tomorrow… since this has been another week of putting in over ten hours a day into my marketing project… only to make less than a dime per hour for my effort… hopefully all this work will pay off in the future when all of the search engine crawlers finally get to my page to notice the work that I’ve done… and reward me with more visitors and income… to where I’m at least earning a dollar a day….

Here we are at the end of another day… and tonight I am feeling old… well… actually… I just feel my age… whatever that’s supposed to mean… especially to a Leap Year baby… am I supposed to act 44… stressed out by my position in life… fully aware that I haven’t accomplished a single goal that I should have by now… when compared to the rest of my peers… or should I act 11… with plenty of life ahead of me… and I’m starting to mature… by implementing the lessons that I learned… as I enter the next phase of existing on this plane…

Here we are at the end of another day… it turns out that I only had the ear appointment today… where I learned that I have perfect hearing… and got a prescription for something to try to clear up the phlegm that I can’t seem to clear no matter how many times I snort and or swallow… I’m hoping that this will provide evidence to me that there is a cure to my ear problem…

Here we are… at the end of another day… and I’m already starting to feel my sleep anxiety kick in because I have an in-office appointment tomorrow morning… for whatever reason… I have a harder time waking up when my appointments aren’t via my telephone… it’s probably because… I have a harder time sleeping since I can’t stop thinking that I didn’t set my alarm clock early enough to get to the appointment on time… and that I’m going to get in trouble… or have to pay a fine for being late…