The Wicker Breakdown:

1. This week's show started with A Message From The President Of The United States Dana as Bush shares a few details on China and the progress to win them over. He then goes on to update America about his dogs before giving more lame examples about how the world is doing better now that he's the president ending of course with the announcement of, "Live from New York..."
2. Steve Martin then officially opened the show by sharing the sketch Dancing In The Dark from 1978 which features him and Gilda Radner dancing around the studio looking serious at times and sill at other as they go from set to set. This turned out to be a touching moment being that Gilda had recently passed away.
3. Pumping Up With Hans And Franz then returned for another installment of more of the same while still being pretty funny. This week, the two muscle-bound brothers brag about their size and strength introduce Steve Martin who they have taken from a scrawny man to being a freak with muscles that are so big that he can barely even move.
4. We then got a fake ad for the album Tammy Wynette Sings The Classics with Jon Hooks as Tammy who sings Stand By Your Man to the tune of various classic tunes.
5. Toonces, The Cat Who Could Drive A Car then made his first appearance on the show and like the title implies, the sketch is about a cat who can drive a car only to end up driving off of a cliff making his owners realize that it was a bad idea to let him try in the first place.
6. Ode To A Loved One was a segment with Steve Martin talking to the audience about the woman he loves as he shares a poem/ode that gets more and more bizarre as it progresses to a disappointing finish where he admits that he's mainly in love because he doesn't want to lose half of his stuff which must have been a weird joke through the eyes of his actual wife.
7. Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers then took to the stage to perform Running Down A Dream.
8. Once again, Dennis Miller gave us the news. This week, A. Whitney Brown dropped in for yet another Big Picture segment which is a dig at the graduating class of 1989 for being idiots the same way that modern adults bitch about millennials and the same way their grandparents talked about them.
9. The New Coneheads was a sketch that just like New Coke, left a bad taste in my mouth because I was such a fan of these characters with the original cast. Luckily, this sketch was just a joke promotion for next season with Lorne Michael explaining that he wanted to reboot these characters to tackle more serious issues in order to broaden the show's appeal to a bigger audience.
10. Get To Know Me! was a sketch with Jon Lovitz out on a date with the "hottest girl in the world." Though they are out at a restaurant this is more of an advertisement than a dating sketch with Lovitz claiming that you can be a success as well by simply doing as the title says and get to know him, guaranteeing your career will advance.
11. Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers then returned to the stage to perform Free Fallin'.
12. Sprockets then returned for another segment, this week Dieter's monkey is more on display as once again he interviews his guests in his strange German ways. Though the show is supposed to be about comedy nothing is all that funny and nobody laughs or smiles.
13. Steve Martin then took to the stage to perform a routine called Steve's Good And Bad Sides where he reveals that he has a scale of attractiveness going from good to bad depending on the angle of the camera, then goes on to share these angles comparing each look to a famous person named Mel and their level of success in the business. 
14. We then got a news segment from the Smokers Cable Network which is a network devoted to smokers with nothing but cigarette based content. 
15. Tonto Tarzan and Frankenstein then took to the stage for Have A Bitchin' Summer where the three sing Seal It With A Kiss to celebrate the upcoming summer break.
16. Finally, Steve Martin closed the show by thanking the audience and saying his goodnights.

SNL: SEASON FOURTEEN SUMMARY