Dateline 2-28-2016

Last night ended up being a real good night for me. I've spent the last week in fear, procrastinating starting my latest ghostwriting project. I even got sick the day after I accepted the gig. It's not that I have doubts that I can pull off the assignment, the problem is that I've felt I was just going through the motions and not really enjoying the process as I wrote my last couple paid scripts.

Last night I finally buckled down and started to write and it felt a lot better than I was expecting. I think what I liked about this one is that I wasn't given that much of an outline and being that the deadline is so tight the client gave me the freedom to write what I want within a few guidelines.

This freedom allowed me to let the story dictate where it needed to go which is how I like to write. I personally don't like outlines. I like to have a concept, a starting point and a goal. Discovering how the characters get from the starting point to the goal while using the concept is why I write.

I don't like being locked into a path. I prefer to sit down and let my imagination run wild. I allow the characters to dictate what needs to be said and where they need to go while being pulled in direction dictated by the concepts of the story.

Last night I started with one story in my mind that I felt was mediocre then about two pages in I found my world.

I'm not sure how well the client will like this but I think I've got a pretty solid story going here which is something I definitely needed at this time. I've been on the verge of quitting fictional writing altogether which has left me feeling a little dead inside.

Now I have a new energy for writing and though my focus is still going to be figuring out how to make a living without having to rely on writing, I no longer feel like I am giving up or that I have to.

I don't need to make a good living, I just need enough to do more than barely scrape by and I need to do it as my own boss. I think that is the only solution to stabilizing my doubts.

As always, I'll keep you posted on my progress.