Dateline 8-1-2016

I think I've finally figured out what I'm trying to accomplish with this daily post. I know I've always admitted that it's an attempt to find my blogging voice but what does that really mean? Though I've been sticking to a strategy that works for me, the hows and whys of the process have remained a back of the mind process that I've yet to fully flesh out into any sort of "mission statement' for lack of a better term.

Early on my goal was to get to the point where I posted on a daily basis. This is why I started with the weekly assignment to put me on a schedule that forced me to create content. After successfully completing my Area 52 self-assignment I moved on to my daily resolution routine. This assignment forced me to write and post content multiple times per day. This might have been too much too early but it led me to develop a routine that I've stuck with to this day.

The failure of my two-year resolution experiment may have been discouraging but I did stick to it until the very end, so I'd say it was only a half failure in that I didn't achieve all my resolution goals. As far as the site goals, the experiment was a success because I posted my progress no matter what the outcome was. I'm finally seeing the overall experience as a win especially since I still see this blog as a learning process that may have years to go until I truly think it's ready to promote as a legitimate site that deserves a daily following.

So I've had the work ethic down for a while now, creating content every day whether or not I feel inspired. The next problem I had to solve was who is my audience? To this day I have no idea who or if anyone reads this. I see that I get traffic but since giving up on the experiments I don't know why or what to think about it. Especially since most of the numbers are coming from areas of the world where my friends are not, so I don't feel like I am writing for people I know.

I spent most of this year battling the urge to defend my work with constant reminders that I'm aware of my weaknesses as I figure this out. A couple months ago I stopped worrying about the audience and started writing what was on my mind, minus the apologies and warning of ramblings. Now I just write what's on my mind and let it be.

I think what helped get me to this point is that I found out who my actual audience is, not the people who literally read this but who I have in mind when I'm writing. Rather than writing to the masses, I started to think of this daily post as writing a letter to a pen-pal that though they don't really know me, I've already won them over to the point where they are interested in what I have to say even if it is something as simple as how I spent my day.

I've been writing with this mentality for quite a while now but it wasn't until last night that I started to think about it in these terms. Now that I'm looking at this site with this new perspective I think it's time to move on to the next step and I think now that I'm acknowledging the issue this might happen faster than other phases of this process. 

Right now I feel like the subject of a documentary and I'm too aware of the camera to fully open up and be myself. I'm pretty damn close to getting past this point but I'm still too mentally aware of the process to fully let go to be my true self on the page... or screen in this case, but as I said I feel like I'm getting close.

Oh well, that's what I've got for today. I'll be back tomorrow with a few more thoughts.

Talk to you then,

- The Wicker Breaker