Dateline 9-8-2017
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Just as I predicted/promised in yesterday's post, last night I finished Phase IV, the final phase of my SNL Review Prep-Work Plan. Though I am very excited to be done, I have to admit, the anticlimactic feeling that comes with accomplishment has me feeling just a little down.
I don't know if it's a writer thing or a me thing but I have yet to really feel any reward from crossing any of my finish lines as I am usually alone in a room, mentally burnt out when crossing that victorious plane. All this while the rest of the world seems unaware of my efforts.
I blame myself as much, if not more than anyone else for this view that my achievements go unrecognized. In fact, this self-defeating outlook on life was the inspiration for my short film entitled 487 which is the story of the race of life with an insignificant slip into the abyss being the final prize not matter what place you come in.
It's a very nihilist piece of work so I'm not surprised that there wasn't more of an enthusiastic reception but I personally never got any feedback at all making me feel like my point of view is pointless in a world where I don't fit in.
Don't worry, these defeated feeling don't usually last that long but they do pop up whenever I complete a major task that was started to be a distraction/outlet from feelings in the first place.
Luckily, this Prep-Work Plan task falls into the distraction category to where it was just brainless work that took up many hours and all I want is a, "Well done," because if this was a big piece of fictional work where my heart and soul get involved, I'd be bed ridden for at least a week in an effort to process the pains that I put myself through just to produce unread content.
So, with that, I will be taking this weekend to just relax because as soon as I get some rest, I'll be starting draft two of my novel that will have me completely wrecked by the time I get to the final page.
As always, I'll keep you posted on my progress when I check in tomorrow.
Sincerely,
The Wicker Breaker
