Dateline 10-23-2016

Every day that goes by I seem to lose more and more interest in the things that I used to love. Last night I watched two movies that I know I would've loved in the past. Though I didn't end up hating either, neither tapped into that part of me that used to leave me feeling entertained. I don't blame either movie for their failure to fulfill, there is definitely something dying within me. Or maybe it's already dead.

The first movie that I watch was a New Zealand film called Hunt for the Wilderpeople. I heard of this movie several months ago and couldn't wait to see it because all of my favorite ingredients are there. I'm a big fan of cinema from Australia/New Zealand, I'm a huge fan of indie films, it's starring Sam Neal and the trailer had a very quirky tone.

How could it go wrong?

I'm not fully sure how it went wrong. I knew in my head that I liked everything that I was seeing but the switch within me never flipped and I never became fully engaged with the experience. Part of the problem definitely stems from working in film which shattered a lot of the magic of pictures moving on the wall. I keep hoping that now that I'm trying another career enough time will eventual pass for the magic to return but last night was apparently not enough.

Hunt for the Wilderpeople was a slower film which I'm usually a fan of but I figured maybe it was the tone that threw me off. I was still desperate to be entertained so I decided to find an over the top comedy. That's when I found the movie Sausage Party. 

Now this movie seemed like it would be totally up my alley. It's an offensive comedy filled with voices of some of my favorite stoner comedic actors. I wouldn't say that I was expecting this movie to be good but I definitely thought it would get at least a couple laughs out of me. 

As I sat there watching the movie, I again, saw stuff that I knew I would have found hilarious in my 20s, and laughable in my 30s but I didn't even chuckle once last night, instead, it left me feeling sad because I want to be able to let go like I used to and laugh at everything. Now my fits of laughter are few and far between.

That's not to say that I don't still laugh. There are podcasts and YouTube videos out there that can really get me going. It's that collapse of my relationship with film that really has me feeling down especially nowadays when anything that I want to watch is pretty much readily available which is pretty much a childhood dream come true.

Oh well, I guess it's time to let go and move on.

Talk to you tomorrow,

The Wicker Breaker